Happiness

In high school  I never dated. I had crushes but guys didn’t like me. I was REALLY awkward and handled it by just keeping to myself. The guys I liked never liked me back or they did like me until they found out I wasn’t easy. I had my first kiss my freshman year in college and so on and so on. I am 34 and have had 2 boyfriends my entire life. I can count on one hand how many people I have slept with. I haven’t had the most stellar dating life. I am really picky but the guys that I have dated are NOTHING and I mean NOTHING like what I look for in guys. I basically settled because “someone liked me”. I always assumed that having a boyfriend would bring me this ultimate happiness. Now that I think about it… I was nowhere NEAR happy with the dudes I dated. I wasn’t even happy with the handful of guys that I have slept with. So now I am in Brooklyn,single, and basically starting over in all aspects of life and I have learned to find my own happiness. (Best year and a half of my LIFE) I have to be happy with myself before I can be happy with someone else. I have to be able to make myself happy before I can make someone else happy.  I have found so much happiness in life the past year and a half and I am doing it BY  MYSELF. There is no man making any of this possible. I have also figured that dropping my standards will not make me happy either. So I will continue to keep my high standards and be happy with my life until the RIGHT ONE comes along. I am not perfect by any means and I have some things that I still need to work out in my life… like budgeting… Where the hell does my money go?!?!?!? **scratches head in confusion** Oh yeh… Rent, takeout and OCR. Take out wins EVERY TIME though. I can order breakfast, lunch and dinner without leaving the comforts of my super fluffy pillows and quilt. If that doesn’t spell happiness then I dont know what does. But getting back on topic… budgeting is a weak spot for me. My attention span is also short. ADD is real!!!! Then there is my relationship with God that I tend to put on the back burner a lot. It’s not that I don’t have a relationship with Him. It’s just that I only give Him a little bit of my time instead of the FULL amount that is deserved. See I know my weaknesses. I know where I need to improve and I believe that is part of the reason I am still single. **Shrugs**  The other reason… I haven’t figured that out yet. All I know is that I will continue to be happy in this holding place. I will continue to explore and grow and evolve… Can I still order takeout morning, noon and night though???? Does anything about this post make sense? It all makes sense in my head. Its all adds up to happiness… THE END

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Author: singleinbrooklynblog

I am a 30 something year old woman living in Brooklyn NY. I am originally from Dallas TX but do not see myself moving back any time in the near future. I have a love for all food especially when it can be delivered to my apartment. I love running OCR even though I am the slowest person out there. I have a short attention span (why NY is the ideal place for me). I am silly, sarcastic, optimistic, easy going and fun. I am also very single and I must say that I am enjoying my Single In Brooklyn life.

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