WHAT UP WHAT UP WHAAAAAAT UP?!?!?! Alrightee we are on day 11… Wait are we?? Hell I don’t know. All I know is that I am still in Colorado and I kicked something else off the “Must do adventure” list. I hit up Castle Rock and did their zip line/sky trek package. DUUUUUUDE. If you visit Colorado you HAVE GOT to do the zipline sky trek deal. Its AAAAAHHHH-MAZING!!!! Everyone is nice and its a challenge. You basically pay for 4 hours on the obstacle course. I ONLY LASTED 2!!!
Lets start from the beginning. I arrived a 7ish and we didn’t begin until around 730ish. They helped us into our harnesses and clicked and locked every buckle that there was. We then grabbed helmets, gloves, and the leather glove cover to protect your hand for when you are stopping. This morning the weather wasn’t bad. It was a little chilly but nothing to complain about. Once we are all geared up, we hopped on the cart and they drove us up to the drop off point.
We get to the drop off and they give us the run down of how everything works and hand signals that we have to look out for. Our guys were super duper nice. We did a total of 10 different zips and they ranged from a few hundred feet all the way to about 1700 feet. We zipped over the most beautiful scenery I have ever seen. The best way to describe it “FUCKING AMAZING” We got up to speeds of over 50mph. HO-LY SHIT!!!! Yeh it was beyond breath taking. They provided us with music, water, CANDY, and jokes. 2 hours of hiking and zipping. At one point we were able to take the “Stairs to heaven” basically a steep set of stairs that make you say “What the FUCK was I thinking” once you get halfway up. Again the views were totally worth it though.
I took my phone because I wanted to record but we did all of the work with steering and stopping soooooo that meant no video footage. They took pics of us though with their camera.
After zipping, it was time for sky trek. Yooooooo… I have no words for the awesomeness that stood before me. It was like Ninja Warrior smoked a little angel dust and came up with what stood before me. I’m so happy that I went to the restroom before going in because I’m pretty sure I would have shat myself more than once. It was this 5 story structure with over 100 obstacles woven through . OH MAH GAH!!!! I climbed, swung, hung, teetered, balanced, rolled, flew… you name it. You are clipped into a special harness the entire time. So I used my phone to take video and pics and I didn’t get half of what I wanted because I had to use both hands for a lot of the course. I’ve never laughed so hard at myself. I made it across rock walls that were suspended 4 stories up!!! THE FUCK?!?!?! Yehhh I’m the person that pays to do stupid shit like that and I LOVE IT!!! I walked a slack line!!! Then I decided let me try the roller trolly thing. You hold on to the bars and run so it will zip you across the line. I knew before I even took hold that it was going to be a bad idea. INSTINCTS DON’T LIE PEOPLE!!! I took off and… Got stuck in the middle. Literally at a dead hang for 2 minutes!! I used my legs to swing and try to propel myself forward but it was not working!!! A girl a few obstacles away saw my struggle and came over as fast as she could. She used the pull rope to get it moving but my dead weight made I kind of hard. We eventually got it moving and I was able to swing myself to get it inching along little by little. When I say little, I really mean little. I played and climbed for another hour before my body said “HEFFA I’M FINISHED!!! You can try to climb something if you want to but I PROMISE YOU BOO BOO… I’m giving out. Don’t try me.” I listened to my body.
After my body told me to SAT DOWN SOMEWHERE… I went down, unclipped my harness and was ready to go… or so I thought. I couldn’t find my keys. MY MUTHA F(*#$%*&$ Rental car keys were GONE!!! I remember putting them in my pocket and then… all of a sudden they weren’t there. I searched and searched and even had one of the guides help me. He was so freaking nice. I checked the ground while he went up all the tiers and looked around. I was like “God… just show me where my keys are. PLEASE. Just point me in the direction I need to go.” Low and behold I walked over to some chairs, looked to my right and THERE THEY WERE!!!! I grabbed them and waved up to he guide and he took a huge sigh of relief. I guess not many people are as lucky. After all of the commotion of playing, getting stuck, almost falling off of a plank, and then losing my keys; I decided “I need… Nooooo I DESERVE a snow cone. The biggest one OUT THERE!!!!” So I pulled up Gully’s Shaved Ice on Waze and drove 50 MIN for an amazing giant cup of artificially flavored ice. BEST.DECISION.EVER!!!
I finished my giant cup of awesomeness while driving, made it to my hotel and rested for a few minutes. I then made my way downstairs to jack 3 shampoos and 4 conditioners from the housekeeping cart (I have a lot of hair y’all) I hopped in my luke warm shower. Remember when I said in an earlier blog that I had the handicapped room??? Yeh the shower SUCKED!!! Its open so basically I flooded the bathroom floor. I had to turn the shower off between my shower, shampooing hair and washing out the conditioner. That means I was freezing my ass off 3 different times so I wouldn’t flood the bathroom. Uuuuuugh. I used all but two towels to mop up the mess and then had to put the soggy towels along the rim of the shower area to keep the water from running out so I could finish washing out the conditioner. After that fiasco, I sat wrapped in a towel and watched hallmark channel. 3 hours later I was like “I guess I should put on my jammies and detangle my hair. Hour and a half later I was detangled, and in a happy sleepy state. That means I was sleep by 630p. WINNING AT LIFE PEOPLE!!!! WINNING AT LIFE!!!!