Who Would Have Thought

What it do blogging world?!?!?!? Its been a quick minute but Im back… at least for tonight. No telling how long it will be for the next post. So this past weekend I ran the Terrain race. It was in Brooklyn and I ended up joining a great team to run with. I pushed myself and beat EVERY obstacle that was there. SHUT.YOUR.FACE!!! Yes y’all!!! I even beat the mutha F($#%^* RIG!!! I have never in my LIFE beat a rig and to nail that one at the terrain race mean no one could tell me SHIT for the rest of the day. I felt like a freaking BEAST!!! **flexes guns** I dedicated this race to Jordan. The 15 year old black boy shot in the head and killed in Texas. And I dedicated it to Black Lives Matter. I do that for EVERY… EVERY race that I run.

Now let me go back in time… Like WAAAAAAAAAY back. I was a SUPER girly girl when I was younger. My dad wanted me to play soccer and all these sports and I was like “Can I do baton twirling??? Ooh GYMNASTICS!!!!” I did both actually. Whatever. I was NOT your super outgoing athletic child… Sports just never really crossed my radar. I was always outside playing but it was like jumping rope  and roller skating, twirling a baton and then gymnastics in my Grandmothers front yard. There was one spot that I WORE OUT!!! Like to the point of no return. Grass stopped growing in that spot because I had wore it down to dust. She always had this immaculate green lawn… with a big ass dirt patch to the left. (my tumble spot) I was SUPER SHY and just not super outgoing. Who would have thought that the shy, goofy non athletic child would take interest in something like OCR?!??!?! Growing up I was the slowest runner (even though I thought I was grease lightning) Wasn’t coordinated for soccer or basketball or softball. Everyone assumes that I played basket ball and ran track. Homey don’t let this long body fool you. I did NONE of that!!HAHAHA.  Who would have thought that the super shy not so athletic child would actually find a twisted kind of joy running endless miles through mud and God knows what?? Who would have thought that the little chocolate girl would with the big teeth and giant ponytails would do alright in such a weird sport where you have to have some kind of coordination??!?! Not I!!! This started out as just something fun to do, just to see if I could do it. Then in morphed into this. “MUST.RUN.OCR. Monster!!!” If I can find a race on Groupon then its good as added on my calendar. Looks can be deceiving. Even my parents look at me sometimes like “Where did this child come from?? She is ours because she looks just like us but… Did we miss a memo somewhere?? Why does she do this crap?!?!?! I do it to prove that I can. I do it… because Im bored. I do it because its one of the things that holds my super short attention span.I do this… because I feel like BEAST and I never had that feeling as a kid.

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Challenge Accepted

Whats up blogging world?!?!?!?!?!?! Guess wha???t I had two challenges this weekend. One was running the City Challenge in Jersey City. Two was going out with friends. Friday I made it home from work and IMMEDIATELY chugged two giant margaritas and followed that with a GIANT plate of nachos. It was totally called for. I spent Friday night doing laundry and watching sappy hallmark movies. Saturday morning rolls around and my alarm is screaming “SOCIAL DAY SOCIAL DAY!!! TIME TO GET UP AND BE SOCIAL TODAY!!!!!” It didn’t actually say that but might as well have. I shut it off 3 times. I dragged myself off of my sofa, put on my running gear and headed out to Jersey City.  Its like a 25 minute train ride HOWEVER my dumb ass got off at the WRONG STOP!!! **face palm** That meant I had to take a taxi to the venue!!! That was 10 bucks!!! Anyway I made it there and it was FLIPPIN COLD! I saw my run buds Hershey, Crystal, Mark,  Kristine and Jen. I drop my bag at bag check and hurry to get in line because well… I was late and needed to get a move on. I didn’t even have time to stretch!!

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On my way to Jersey

Stretching didn’t matter because I ran the race and completed every obstacle there was!!! I had trouble on one and that was the inverted wall. I got stuck and couldn’t pull my body over. This random guy offered to help and here is what happened

Guy: Do you need some help?

Me: Yeh. Im stuck. Just give me a boost over.

Guy: **Runs to get behind me** Ummm where do you want me to uhhh. How do I push?

Me: Just push my butt!

Guy: I uhhh. Umm are you sure?? I uhh…

Me: PUT YOUR HANDS ON MY ASS AND PUSH!!!!

He pushed me over and all went well. I made the rig for the most part and did rope climb!!! YES!!! Freaking sandbag carry weighed a TON!!!! But I FINISHED!!! For a second I thought of doing a second lap… and then said “NOPE” Weeeellll Crystal found me and said “Run a second lap.Come on. We are lining up in 15 minutes” Well damn. I couldn’t punk out so I ran lap two… or walked. I walked a lot of lap two. My body was hurting and my knee was KILLING ME!!!! Obstacles and pavement do NOT agree with my body AT ALL.  I finished lap two and guess who I saw at the end?? CARMEN and CISCO!!!! Now these two are a part of the small group of people I enjoy being around AND they love donuts as much as I do!!! YES Y’ALL!!!

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Carmen!!!!!
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Walked or should I say LIMPED away with two medals!!!

I hung out for a little bit and then said “ehhh let me head home so I can take a quick nap”… I didn’t nap. You know what I did?? I went and gorged on AAAAALLLL of the fried food with my old childhood friend Angela and her husband. When I say we ate AAAALLLLLL of the fried food… we tried some of everything that was fried and turned our noses up to anything that looked Remotely healthy!! “Oh that has veggies??? NEEEXXT!!” “That one is deep fried in crisco?? GIVE IT TO ME NOW!!! LORD JESUS THANK YOU FOR THIS BLESSING!!!” Sitting and laughing with these two was so much fun and it was just like old times!!! We laughed at the same shit we used to laugh about as little pip squeak kids.

I hated to say goodbye to these two but they had naps to catch up on and I had a date with my shower, sofa and hallmark channel. You ever taken a shower and just turned on the hot water?? No cold water mixed in?? That shower was like FIRE and I LOVED IT!!!! OH MAH GAH!!! I threw on my trusty sweats and proceeded to lay spread eagle on my sofa. The only things I could move were my fingers to change the channel and I was able to turn my head… Thats IT!!! 8p hits and I hit snooze on my phone. 815 comes around and I snooze again. Finally 830 comes and I had to roll myself off of my sofa and struggle into a pair of jeans and a sweater. I fluffed my hair, painted my face and hit the subway because IT WAS CHELSEA’S BIRTHDAY and no way in hell was I missing that!!! I limped all the way to the train, and all the way to the karaoke bar. I am so damn happy that I went. I laughed non stop. I didn’t get on stage (stage fright) but I did plenty of dancing and singing from my seat at our table area. SUCH A GREAT NIGHT!!!

The party ended for me around 1. I couldn’t keep my eyes open on the train ride home!!! I made it home around 2 and CRASHED… on my sofa. I did not wash my face or tie my hair up. I barely made it out of my clothes and into sweats. I face planted on my sofa and didn’t wake until around 9ish. Even then… I just moved my fingers to turn on the TV and turned my head to see because… GOLDEN GIRLS!!! Im so sorry but that show is LEGIT!!!! I can watch it all damn day!!!! Around 3 I decided enough was enough and it was time to clean. So I Cleaned my apartment and folded the Mount Fuji of laundry. Then I went back to face plant on my sofa. Nowhere in that time span did I attempt to brush my teeth, shower or comb my hair. I looked like an abused barbie doll and gave ZERO CRAPS about it!!!!! HAHAHAHA!