It’s 2024, Lets Goooooooo

I feel like every year starts with the “New Year new me” motto. Everyone is looking for the “better” the “I’m going to do better”. Everything is NEW NEW NEW.

I’m going to be honest with you guys. This is the first year that I have felt like “new year new me” The first time in a really long time. 2023 kicked my ass emotionally, physically, spiritually, financially, mentally. I was so beyond depressed, out of all of the shapes, emotionally depleted and financially LOST. I tried to find my happy but the sadness just over shadowed it all. I felt like I couldn’t catch a break. I just wanted it to end. I hit a point of where I wanted to go to sleep and never wake up. I would take 3 steps forward and get pushed back 100000. Has anyone ever been there?? I really tried to smile through it all but my eyes said that my soul was DONE!!!

Trying to smile even though my world was crumbling

I was dating someone for 6 years and it all came crashing down. I ended it because I was like “You don’t have time for me. I get it, work is your life right now.” Well turns out work wasn’t the reason he didn’t have time for me. Dude was dating other women and turned out HE WAS MARRIED! ALL AT THE SAME DAMN TIME!!! Oh and with kids!!! Dude has a WHOLE ASS FAMILY!!!!! I had no clue. Then on top of that he stole from me in every way possible and then DENINED all of it even though I had and still have the proof.

This cut me DEEEEEEP!! I gave my all to someone who cared NOTHING for me. Motherfucker took full advantage of my kindness, giving spirit, and busy work schedule. Dude took full advantage!!! I was COMPLETELY blindsided. My friends… My nitty gritty friends sat on the phone with me night after night while I sobbed, screamed, and talked. They knew I was in a dark place but they never let me stay there. They let me feel all of the feelings but never let me stay there too long. My mom basically moved in with me for a month to help me sort through the bullshit havoc that the ex ( known as Satan’s penis wrinkle) caused. I’d lost myself… just completely let myself go. Without my 3 FOREVER SISTERS ( My Bella Crew) and my parents… I don’t know where I would be right now. The thing that I learned about being depressed is that even though you know its a shitty place to be… It’s also comforting or at least it was for me. I knew it would always be there to wrap me in the warmth of blankets and slumber. Turn on lights?? For what?? The darkness was now my warm hug.

Trying to pull myself out of a dark place

Work began to consume all of my time. I wanted more time with friends and to do the things that I really enjoyed but just didn’t have the time. At 42 and going through what I went through I needed a therapist!!! But I didn’t have the time. I wanted to run races with my friends but I either didn’t have the time or I was just in a mentally dark place. There were things that I wanted to participate in for my children’s book but my work travel schedule was bananas and always always always came first. My active lifestyle became obsolete.

I was living in an apartment that I could no longer afford and it held all memories with the lying cheating sack of horse poop. I moved out. I started saying “Yes” to opportunities that made me better. I started doing things for me. I started doing something that I hadn’t done in years and that was “put me first”. I started sticking up for myself. And Finally towards the end of the year I took the biggest leap ever…

I quit my job and moved back to Texas. I had to. NY had become tainted by previous events. I was too far from my main mental support system… my family. I needed that support system. I packed up 10 years of belongings, said goodbye and BOUNCED… and I have not looked back.

It has not been easy but it hasn’t caused me stress or misery. The fresh start has been a literal life saver. I was able to spend the holidays with family and friends, reconnect with old friends, RELAX and just be. There is a sparkle in my eyes again. My smile is real. The healing is real. The weight lifted is real. Now don’t get me wrong, I still get really angry when I think about what happened but I don’t sit in it and let it take over my every thought. I still get to work with children but in a way that allows me to still have a life outside of work. I am the happiest that I have been in years.

So 2024 is not “New Year New me” its “a new year, better version of me” This is the year that I show up for myself. This is the year that I start giving myself permission to live life. This is the year that I start giving myself permission to do the things that I love. I’m ready!!! This is the year for me to really get Bella’s books out there. THIS IS THE YEAR Y’ALL!!! I hope y’all are ready cuz I sure as hell am. LETS GO


























Welp… It’s a BIGGUN

What it do whoooodi whoooooo??? I only said it because it rhymed. HA!!! There is so much catching up to do!!! A LOT has taken place since the summer vacation blogs. A LOT!!! I’m going to try to give you the cliff notes version. Y’all know I can be long winded so we will see how this goes.

1. During summer vacation I had time to sit and process some of the traumatic bullshit that had taken place in my life. I’m still processing everything and learning how to move forward and not sit in the anger and sadness of depression. The struggle was real y’all. I still get angry over the betrayal, gaslighting and manipulation but I’m learning that it’s ok to have these feelings but it’s not ok to just get stuck in them. I talk them out with the besties and move right along.

2. There was a ton of travel both for work and for Bella. Work always takes me to Paris or somewhere in France. Bella always always ALWAYS takes me home to Dallas Texas.

3. Shit hit the fan

4. Khrys moved back home.

I’m not going to elaborate on 1-3 because… well I’m not going to. So I will stick with moving back home.

DFW what’s up?!?!?!? It’s good to be back. Moving back home was both the easiest and hardest thing I’ve done in a while. Hard because I left a place that I had called home for 10 years. Job, apartment, friends… everything. I put in a 2 weeks notice, threw everyone for a fucking loop and moved back home. It needed to be done though. It was time for me to finally put myself first. It’s wasn’t easy by any means. There is always the tiny voice that says “You’re letting them down”. I had to repeat to myself two phrases:

1.You can do hard things

2. You matter

I worked my last two weeks, packed some stuff, flew home to participate in the Black Child Book Fair,

unload what was packed, ate all of the food and flew back to NY to finish packing up my apartment, and shipped my car but had to buy a new battery because the one I had went to the upper room. Mommy flew out to help me do the last wee bits of packing before the shipping company came to pick everything up. My last day in the apartment was spent with my mom, my good friend Tim and just a few items that I had to leave behind. There were so many pieces to this crazy life puzzle and they were all being moved and shifted in different directions all at the same time.

After getting everything shipped out… we shipped out. Being back home has been beyond amazing. It’s the first Christmas that I have had with my family in like 7 or 8 years. I spent the day eating all of the home cooked food that my dad placed in front of me. Same went for days 2 through 4. And let’s not forget all of the snow cones. Then it was Christmas and it was so beyond awesome. The best gift was the gift of family and friends.

I never thought in a million years that I would be moving back home at the awesome age of 42 but here we are. Guess what?? I’m ok with that. I’m ok with loving on my tiny family and letting them love on me. I’m ok with reconnecting with old friends. The most important thing is that Im completely ok with reconnecting with myself, who I am and who I was created to be. I’m excited for Bellas great adventures to take completely off in the best possible way. GET READY YALL!!! It’s about to go down

Next Up… Still on Vacation!

Day 3!! LETS DO THIS! Day 3 of operation vacation was easy but still loaded with all of the fun. We all woke up stupid early. Chip wakes early because his body is just programmed that way. 5am every day. Me? My body was still on France time. It was cool to wake before the sun. Not because I had to but because my body wanted to. It’s so much easier to wake up early when its not mandatory. Go figure. It was another morning walk with Edna leading the way as always.

Edna leading the way… But first have to pee on all of the big rocks and trees.

I freaking adore that stubborn bag of fluff. I can not wait until I can get a dog. It’s gonna be great. That’s not what Day 3 is about though. Short attention span much??

Heeeey Edna

Before we started the walk, we demolished ginormous pieces of tiramisu with amazing cups of the best Italian coffee. No complaints here. That’s one of the things that I miss about Italy… The coffee!!! We also felt the need to go for donuts. You can’t visit Texas and not hit up Shipley’s Donuts for fresh wondermous donuts. Now back to this coffee…LAWD JEEEEZZZUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSS the coffee is beyond amazing. Anyway Chip had planned an awesome day of visiting some of Austins best thrift stores and quirky Austin shops that fully support the “ Keep Austin weird” theme.LETS GO!!!

TIRAMISU AND COFFEE!!!!

The first store we hit was one of those fun”Austin stores. I LOVED it. I looked at every hat, pair of socks, tee, coffee mug, you name it!!! It was amazing. What wasn’t amazing were the damn prices. 30 bucks for a simple ball cap?? I THINK THE FUCK NOT. NOPE! Ain’t gone be able to do it. We went to a few other thrift stores that had amazing finds but THEM PRICES were NOT thrift prices. They weren’t astronomical per se but for a thrift store… Ain’t no way.

Oh oh oh we also went to another awesome amazing place… We went to the restaurant where they filmed Dazed and Confused!! We didn’t eat anything, but we did use their Photo Booth!!!!

After our thrifting adventure we went somewhere magical. “Where’d you go Khrys??” I’m so glad you asked!! We went to a place called Lala’s Little Nugget. It’s this small bar that is all and everything Christmas 365/7. Yeh… All day. ER’DAY is Christmas. Hallmark, Hobby Lobby, the Griswold’s, and Whoville threw up in there. It was awesome!!! Nothing matched and there were lights and decorations everywhere. Oh it was awful, tacky and magical all at the same time. We were the first ones there for the day. They opened at 4pm and we arrived at 4:03pm. There wasn’t a menu of drinks to choose from but Chip knew what he wanted: Deep Eddys lemon vodka with sprite. So I decided to just order the same thing and boy was that a good choice. We walked around and explored the bar, took pictures sitting Santa’s giant chair, screamed “SANTA” with Buddy the Elf, and also posed with the super creepy giant wax Santa. Oh it looked like it would come to life. Chip took a pic. I did not because it absolutely creeped me the fuck out. Y’all know my imagination is wild. There is no middle ground. All sunshine and rainbows or compete morbid fuckery. All I could imagine was giant wax Santa trying to murder me… Yup.

We finished our drinks, hopped in the car and headed home. On the way home I had Chip stop at a near by fast food place so I could get some fried pickles. I’d been craving them. We made a quick pit stop for my snack before heading home. Now part of the plan was to go to this cool Tex Mex restaurant but Chip said it didn’t make sense to pay a crap ton of money for what we could easily make at home for less than half. Yeh I was totally game. Sign me up for a good cheap home cooked meal. We bought the makings for loaded queso, chips, and everything to make guacamole. We made it home and hit the kitchen preparing everything. We got everything cooked and as I was penning a blog, Chip handed me a fresh tortilla that was stuffed with refried beans, queso, guacamole and salsa. Now weird Khrys fact: I don’t eat beans. I don’t like them and never have. I have a long dramatic but non traumatic story/reason as to why I don’t eat them. I’m not going to drag it out. I’ll save that for “weird Khrys Fact” blog. I was dreading taking that bite but he’d made it before I could say anything. So I took it and ate it. Yoooooooo! That was the most amazing simple burrito I’d ever had. After I demolished it in 4 bites, I said “Chip… I don’t eat beans. No beans…but this right here… that you made is gosh damn witch craft!!! Oh mah gah that was amazing and I need another.” I think I ate two more plus a massive bowl of loaded queso. After eating all of the food, we all settled in on the couches to watch a movie. We settled in on the classic “EVER AFTER” Its a favorite of mine. I’m a huge Drew Barrymore fan and that’s a favorite along with all of the Charlies Angel movies.

FRIED PICKLES!!!

Day 3 was epic in a low key way and I loved every freaking minute of it. This vacation is shaping up to be The most epic of epic and I am ok with that.

Vacation Shenanigans Continues

VACATION MODE IS STILL IN EFFECT!!! YAAAAAS!!! Let me tell y’all about day two vacation mode!!! We all woke and had an amazing morning filled with coffee and a walk down to the dried up Lake Travis. Y’all… Lake Travis should be called “Rock Travis” There is little to no water in that bad boy. NOTHING!!! Dry!!! It was literally just dirt and rocks with a small patch of water.

Edna lead the way. We drove down and parked the car and she lead us to where she wanted us to walk. We walked down the rocks to where the water barely touched. It hadn’t gotten too hot yet so it felt really nice out. The sun rising and the sound of the water slapping the rocks was complete peace. COMPLETE PEACE!! Any and all stress that I was holding was instantly GONE!! Joy… I was experiencing joy.

After our walk we made a pit stop at the grocery store for last minute ingredients for the tiramisu. Remember the day before we grabbed some things at World Market but there were a few more things that we needed. I also grabbed a few things that we didn’t need because who really abides by a shopping list?? NOT I!!!! We made it back home and got to work. Neither of us had made this before but its a favorite and we were going to make this happen. And boy did we!!!! We separated, added, mixed, added more, mixed some more, added some magic (coffee liquor… a whole lot of it) and love. We created the best damn magical tiramisu!!!

We had to let it chill for at least 4 hours. Well SHIT… What do you do while waiting?? You make a run to the New Orleans snow cone stand right down the street. It’s over 100 something degrees outside so snow cones are A MUST!!! I am basic Betty when it comes to artificial flavored ice flakes. Strawberry and blue coconut are a MUST for me. If they don’t have these then I will do tropical treat but 99.9% of the time its going to be strawberry and blue coconut

“Chip has it been 4 hours yet?? Is it time to try the tiramisu??” He responded with “Its been maybe an hour Khrys… No!!!” Well shit!!!! What do we do?? LIQUOR STORE!!! Gotta get all of the fixings for awesome margaritas!!!! Yes please and thank you. It’s never too early or too late for a margarita. It’s 5p somewhere right??? Isn’t that what they say because I know for damn sure it what I say. We loaded up on fixings for margritas and I asked again “Is it time for tiramisu??” Again Chip let me down with “Khrys… No.” Well SHIIIIIT!!!! What do we do now?!?!?!?!?! It’s freaking hotter than Satans ball sack in a pair of gasoline undies lit on fire in the deepest pits of hell!!! WHAT DO WE DO?!?!?!? Well… You go find a spot in Lake Travis that actually has water and go for a swim!!! That’s what you do!!! Me and Chip loaded up all of the pool noodles, filled our giant TO-GO cups up with margaritas and headed out to the one spot of shaded water. Water temp was amazing!!! What wasn’t amazing is not being able to see my feet and feeling all of the water trees… lake plants… whatever you want to call them touching my feet. All I could think about was that part in the Little Mermaid (the first one) when Ursula had changed all those mermaids to weird creatures that grabbed at her as she swam by. Yeh I kept picturing that and in my head I was screaming “URSULA IS GETTING ME!!!!!”

We floated for a bit. Or we floated long enough to finish our drinks and then hopped out and headed home. Long enough to say “We floated/swam in Lake Travis” BWAHAHAHA!!! Now what?!?!?!?! SHOWER!!! Lake Travis isn’t toxic but its not the cleanest clearest lake. So an INSTANT HOT shower was mandatory.

We then sat in the living room and watched Tu Wung Foo!!! I mean why not?!?! I’ve only seen it like once in my life but it’s a memorable movie. While watching the movie, I put the pom Pom machine to use. YES the one I bought while drunk on day one. Baby once I got the hang of it, I was cranking out Pom poms like a gosh damn machine!!!! I made three sets of giant Pom poms!!! Why all of the poms Khrys?!?!?!?!?!? Ohhhh I am so glad that you asked.

ROLLERSKATING!!!! Yes the poms were made for our night of rollerskating!!! You can’t get me and Chip together and NOT have some kind of childish adventure. Best part besides the Pom poms attached to our skates was that we got his husband and two good friends to join our fun!!! We skated for almost 3 hours!!! My BIG WHEEL skate party childhood was brought back to life… FULL FORCE!!! We laced up added our poms and hit the floor for adult skate night. 90’s R&B and hip hop were in full swing. For 3 hours I was totally transported to the magical part of my childhood that was skating. There were some real pros out there. I was not one of them but I held my own. Marti was a speed demon. Chip coasted on the outskirts and their friends flew by. At one point the DJ called “FAST SKATE!!!!!” We all hopped off because… yeh we were NOT trying to be run over by people skating 90mph!!! Marti rolled up to me and said “Come on Khrys.Lets go. You got this! We can do it!!” Ok that’s basically saying “ I DARE YOU!!” I can’t say no to that. We hopped our asses out there and HO-LY HELL!!! WE kept up but GHAT DAMN my legs were burning!!! BURRRRRRNIIIIIING!!!! These were muscles that hadn’t really been used. My quads and hamstrings were singing soprano. JEEEEEZZZZUUUUUUUS!!!

Baby when I tell you day two of vacation was a TIME… BAY-BAY WEEEEE HAD A TIME!!!! It’s times like this that live rent free in my memories forever. FOREVER. FOR-EV-ER!!!!

It’s Vacation Bitch!!!

Yooooooooooooo!!!!!! The time has finally come! ITS VACATION BITCH!!! YAAAAAS HONEY!! I’ve needed this vacation since yester-year. My original plan was to hit the tropics. A beach, blue water, a hammock, adventures and a cabana boy bringing me cocktails round the clock. THAT was the plan!!!

Well plan had to change because more important things came up like CREATING BOOK TWO and the beach had to be put on pause. Why?? Because now there is something called budgeting and staying in my money lane!!!! Well SHHHHIIIIIIIT!!!

That’s ok though because I always have a plan!!! What’s just as good as going to a tropical paradise?? Going back HOME to be with your amazing family and friends. YUP!!! Y’all I miss my family and friends something fierce!!!! So I asked my mommy if I could use one of her flight passes to fly home to Dallas. Of course she said yes because I AM HER CHILD and SHE LOVES ME!!

I left work in France on Friday afternoon, landed in NJ Friday afternoon, chilled in my apartment Saturday and Sunday was the Day to bust a move!! I woke at 2 , was ready by 4, and at the airport by 420. Boarding started at 6. I got bumped. I was bumped off of every single flight. EVERY. SINGLE. FLIGHT. After getting bumped off the first two flights, I made a friend with someone who was bumped as well and we found a bar and started drinking. Turns out we shared the same name with the difference of one letter. She was dope as hell. She finally made a flight… I did not. That lead me to finally get food and another drink and then I needed snacks and then decided that I was just going to sleep in the airport so I had to buy a hoodie. I know that was one long ass run on sentence but who cares. Just go with it mmk?? Y’all I slept in the Newark airport. That was not a comfortable sleep at all but it was made tolerable by BENADRYL!!!! Benadryl came in CLUTCH!!! With Benadryl sleep was possible even though every piece of furniture was like sleeping on a cinder block.

I woke up Monday morning hopeful but prepared for the worst. Why would you even think that way Khrys? BECAUSE THAT FLIGHT WAS SOLD OUT LIKE THE ONES FROM DAY BEFORE!!!! That’s why!! I went to the restroom, washed my face and brushed my teeth. Added a little bit of pizazz to the face and kept it moving. When I say pizazz that just means concealer and eyeliner so it looks like Im an actual decent looking woman instead of an overtired bridge troll.

The gate agents came back and one of them recognized me from the day before. As I watched the plane fill up and everyone’s name get called she looked at me and said “You waiting?” “ I said “Yup. Been here since the first flight from yesterday morning.” She gave me an apologetic smile and went to typing. 5 min later she called “Robinson!!!!” I jumped up so damn fast. “She goes “Are you ok with being in middle seat exit row??” I replied “Ma’am… You could tell me to sit in Cargo and I wouldn’t even care.” She just died laughing and gave me my ticket. I MADE IT YALL!!!! I MADE IT!!!! I got on the plane and happily took the middle seat headed to Dallas. I also went to sleep IMMEDIATELY. Ya girl was EXHAUSTED. BEYOND exhausted and Benadryl was still running through my system so yeh… It was INSTANT SLEEP!

We landed in DFW 3 and a half hours later and it like walking into a wall of HOT. It was like Satans undercarriage hot. Like the underbelly of hell kind of heat. Did I care?? NOT ONE GOSH DAMN BIT!!!! Drove to go pick up my rental car and… couldn’t get the rental. That entire plan fell through and my day was about to be ruined. Like there was no way around it… or was there?? THERE WAS!!! I bought a plane ticket to Austin. I was really pissed until I realized that I was actually saving money. Sooooo i bought a round trip ticket to Austin and it was ON ANDS POPPIN!!!!

I made it to Austin and my buddy Chip picked me up. YAAAAALLLL it was pure shenanigans from that moment on!!! We made it to the house and it was COCKTAIL TIME!!!! We started with deep eddy’s lemon vodka mixed with pomegranate juice. BRUUUUUUH!!! That is a combination for ya and it is amazing!!!! We polished 1 each and then decided we needed food. That took us to Chuy’s for Tex Mex. We had giant to go cups of home drinks which led to tipsy dinner. There was a 30 min wait at Chuys so we walked to World Market for coca and ladyfingers… While tipsy we got the bright idea to make a tiramisu. Then we walked to Michaels because we also had the bright idea Pom poms for roller skating and yes we made this decision while drinking. Our most epic ideas always come after we’ve knocked back a few cocktails. ALWAYS. We walked back to Chuys and were immediately led to our table. We demolished plates of food and then went back home where we all crashed because we are old and bedtime is nothing past 9:30

Is this the start to an amazing vacation?? You bet your gosh damn dollar it is and this is JUST the beginning!!! Buckle up buttercup because its about to be Shenanigans from here on out!!! LETS GO!!!

I See Ya 42… I See Ya

It has been light years since I’ve actually typed and posted anything. I typed something back in March… Two things actually. All I had to do was hit the “publish” button. Only thing is that I was writing from a place of anger. I was really angry and I was hurt… completely gutted. Because I was angry and hurting, I was bout to put a whole bunch of negativity out there and say “FUCK IT!!! Let the chips fall where they fall!!!” I had screen shots, all pictures uploaded and ret ta go!!!! I was BOUT TA DO IT!!! But then my inner voice said “ AHT AHT… you bet not hit ‘post’. You can write it up and type it out but BITCH YOU BETTA NOT CLICK POST!!! You Bet NOT!!!” I’d already given the situation too much of my time mentally, physically and spiritually. The end of 41 SUCKED!!! Seriously. The last 5 months of being 41 were complete SHIT for me. My last days of 41 I decided that 42 was going to be different. I SET that intention and BAAAAY-BAAAAAAAY!

I decided there was going to be some changes in the year of 42. I was going to be a better person and focus on me rather than focusing on everyone else. Take care of myself instead of everyone else. I am realizing it’s past time for me to start doing things for me. Getting back to loving me, myself, and I. Getting back to doing the things that I like to do. I am learning how to make time and space for me again.

So what did you do Khrys??? How’d you ring in 42?? Well I am so glad that you asked. I brought 42 in with the people that mean the world to me. There was a lot of brunching, a lot of drinking, a lot of love, a lot of laughter, a lot of amazing energy, and just an all around FUCKING GOOD TIME!! I was missing 2 people( part of my Bella Crew) but they are in different states.

We had a TIME!!!! Turn up was real

My birthday fell on a Monday so I made sure that the weekend before was going to be epic!!! Gotta bring everything in RIGHT!!! So I set the intention of starting work on book 2. Sunday morning I woke early and had a freaking 2 hour phone call with my amazing illustrator. The illustrator that I have the pleasure of working with is a whole ass vibe and I mean that in the best way!!! We were gassin each other up in the most positive of ways. GASSED THE FUCK UP!!! Then to make it even better, she drew a quick mock up that had me in happy tears.

The stories that I create for Bella are all of my happiest childhood memories put to paper. Stephanie Hider somehow reaches in my head and creates everything that I see in my minds eye. I don’t even have to tell her!!! She just knows!!! SHE KNOWS!! When we solidified everything, I had to mark this moment in time. How did I do that?? With ink. My mom came with me for my inking moment. Bella glasses on the right (write)arm… See what I did there?? HA!

Now my actual birthday was spent working. Remember my birthday was on a Monday. Summers are always spent working in France. I also got to spend sometime in Florence and some other part of Italy that I don’t remember but it was really pretty.

All of the Cappucinos in Paris, and all of the pasta and Gelato in Italy.

This is the first year that I haven’t been completely stressed the fuck out. Normally with work travel I am MISERABLE and STRESSED all the way out from the JUMP. But I am finding out that being single and set free from a lying sack of shit of a trash human really takes a load off… WHO KNEW?!?!?!?! My off days have been spent finding who I am, what I want, what I need and what I am going to do about it. I have been living in my head a lot and not in a bad way. My imagination is wild. It’s either all sunshine, sparkles and rainbows oooorrrrrr the worst possible level of fuckery that you can think of. There is no middle ground here, It’s weird. But I’m used to it. It’s what makes me… me. This time around my thoughts haven’t been going to the deep ends of hell. They’ve been in the glitter sparkle safe space.

What good has come from the glitter sparkle safe space?? Well I AM SOOO HAPPY YOU ASKED… again. I was going to tell you whether you wanted to know or not. ANYWAY I penned a new manuscript for Bella’s series. My imagination has also taken on a complete life of its own at times and I COMPLETELY check out. Where does my imagination go?? Ohhhh it goes to picturing my dream man. The man that is going to love me forever. The man that is going to appreciate my quirky adventure awesomeness. The man that I see in my mind is gosh damn amazing!!! I am a big believer in manifesting what I want. Yup I know what I want and more importantly what I deserve.

My future is a little up in the air and I have an idea of what’s to come but at the same time I have no idea how its going to play out. The queen of random shit has been a bit of a stick in the mud the past few years. That’s all changing though and I am more than ready. Getting my body right,spirit right and goals in place. LETS GO!!!

Hi I’m Khrys and I am back stronger and better than before. Buckle up buttercup because this is about to be one hell of a year.

Oh yeh and I hope you have grabbed your copy of the first book in Bellas series!!! Bella and the Great Picture Day is available EVERWHERE!!! Amazon, Walmart.com, Target.com, Barnes and Noble.com and If you are in Buffalo NY swing by Alice Ever After Books and grab your copy there.

Ohhhh The Travel of it All

Alrightee people what it do?!?!?!?! I am trying to do a better job of keeping up with the blog. It’s pretty hit or miss though… Ooops. I am doing pretty good though. Exhausted is an understatement but I am still doing good. The last time I had to work Christmas, I was MISERABLE and depressed. The work environment was toxic as hell and I absorbed all of that shit and hated every minute of it. I was exhausted and overworked and NO ONE cared!!! Last year I was off for like 3 weeks and happily sat in the middle of my apartment basking in the awesomeness of not having to do SHIT!! OH MAH GAH it was sooooo gooooooooooood!!! This year the boss’ said “Pack up Boo Boo cuz we are OUTTA HERE!!!!”

I had a day off and then worked and worked and then had to ask “Is it ok if I sit out for Christmas??” I know they wanted me to spend Christmas Day with them but ya girl needed to turn off. Y’all know I’m introverted and I needed to turn all the way off. Look I’ve talked about this before but let me say it again. I am an extroverted introvert. I know how to be extroverted and I am really good at it, BUT I prefer to be introverted. And I absolutely have to have that time to myself where I can just turn completely off. NO PEOPLING whatsoever!!! Love what I do as a nanny but I have to have my days where I can turn it off.

Christmas Day: Ya girl slept ALLLLL the way in. YAAAAS!!!! This time zone change has been kicking my ass 30 different ways and I still don’t feel like I have caught up at all. Uggggggh!!! Ok now my plan was to eat the biggest breakfast in life and then trek to the Eiffel Tower because why I the hell not.

I used trusty ole google to find a place, walked smooth past three OPEN cafes to go to this one spot, get there and it’s closed. CLOSED!! THE FUCK!?!?!?!?! Look I get it: ITS Christmas Day BUUUUUUUT GOOOOOOOOGLE said it was open. GOOGLE LIED!!!! I then googled another place that google said was open, walked another 20 minutes and guess what… CLOSED!!! Mind you I also passed like 3 other cafes that were open!!! FUCK ME!!!! What does a girl have to do to get coffee and bacon?!?!?!?!?!?! I walked a bit more and came across a hotel with a ton of outdoor seating. There were a lot of people but I was able to be seated in the distance as to not be trapped by the million people. I had a coffee, chocolate croissant and an omelette with ham. Let me tell you about that coffee. It came in a tin cup thing that was maybe the size of an American cup of coffee. The coffee cup was the size of a cup from a child’s tea party set. IT WAS THE STRONGEST COFFEE IN LIFE!!!! MYYYYYY GAAAAAAWD!!! This was also the most expensive breakfast ever. 38 euros!!!!

I left there and made my way to the great tower. I got all my steps in for real but for some reason my watch counted none of them!! That was a tad annoying because I just KNEW that I had killed my step game for the day… hell even the week. I had done over 30 minutes of walking just trying to find a place to eat. Tack on another hour and I was for sure I had reached my goal. My watch on the other hand said ” NOT TA-DAY BOO!!!!” The Eiffel Tower is gorgeous. It’s really a site to see. What wasn’t a site to see was the massive crowd of people piled up to get to the top. People were swarmed around like the world isn’t on the brink of another massive shut down. I stood back and all I saw was COVID. Yeh I’m not about that life… AT ALL. Like what the actual fuck people?!?!?! I looked around and saw something magical. There was a lady selling cotton candy. Not your regla (Yes I said REGLA) ole tiny cotton candy shoved into a plastic bag. No No No This was GINORMOUS puffs of pink sugar goodness and light!!! YES PLEASE!!! I bought one for 4 euros, sat far far away from the crowds in a shaded area, and demolished my sugar treat while watching people get swindled for money. That was really entertaining.

While people watching, it started to rain. I figured “I’m already outside so might as well walk to the Arc De Triomphe.” Google then told me that it was like another 34 minutes of walking in the opposite direction of my hotel. I was already an hour and some change away so to tack on another 30 minutes was a huge HELL TO THA NAH NAH NAH for me. I did the next best thing which actually turned out to be the best idea EVER!!!! I headed back to my hotel but stopped at a near by grocery store for a bottle of champagne, orange juice and a few bags of chips. I made it back to my hotel and ordered uber eats KFC chicken tenders and binged Netflix. Mimosas, food, and Netflix… can’t really beat that. Not the absolute best Christmas but sure as shit wasn’t the worst. I’ve had some pretty crappy Christmas’ in the past and this was HEAVEN.

Again??? Ok. Lets Go

Hello Hello HEEEELLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOO HEL-LO!!!!

It has been one hell of a ride that I have been on. I think that last time I talked to you guys I was somewhere in the South of France… Or was I just getting back home?? Can’t remember but that doesn’t matter. What matters is that I’M BACK to sharing my crazy world with you all. The past few months have been one hell of a stressful blur but the end product was worth all of IT!!! My thumbs are finally getting a break. When I am nervous, I have a habit of basically scratching the inside of my thumb. I have basically scratched a hole in both of my thumbs. It’s a sick habit and I have no idea how it even became a habit or when but there you have it. UUUUUGGGGGHHHHHH!!!

Where do I begin?? Ok lets start at the part where I WROTE A BOOK!!! A WHOLE CHILDRENS BOOK!!!! And guess what??? IT’S OUT!!!!! Sooooo much love went into creating this!!! I wrote this story almost 10 years ago!! I let it sit for years and years. I rewrote it and revised it multiple times. I had it read over a bazillion times before letting it sit in my computer to collect dust. I submitted manuscript after manuscript to publishers and agents for 4 years and all I got back were turn down letters. Soooo I just stopped. I felt so damn defeated. And then one day I was like “Just do what people were telling you from the jump :SELF PUBLISH!!!! The reason I didn’t want to self publish was because I didn’t want to come out of pocket and I knew it was going to be hard find everything I needed to make this happen. I just wanted to create the story and let someone else do the technical part. WELL… when the doors keep closing you just have to put on your best Doc Martens and kick the damn door in yourself. And that’s just what I did… am doing.

I found an amazing illustrator by the name of Stephanie Hider. I had like little to no money but knew she was who I needed for my vision to come to life. I may have dipped into AAAALLLLL of my “Bill” money to pay her but I did what I had to do. Working with her was simply amazing. She took my vision and brought it to life!!! She even created things that I didn’t even know how to explain. Homegirl reached into my brain without me knowing and brought EVERYTHING to life. Her patience with me was insane. She held my hand through the entire creative process. She made it so easy!!

Once I picked the shape of the face, eyes, hair, glasses, and all of the tiny details and design, she was able to add it all together and create magic. I used different people in my life or inspiration. Bella my main character is based off a tiny version of myself, my Goddaughter, and the tiny human that I currently nanny. Bella’s mom was a different story but not a hard one at all. I knew who I wanted Bella’s mom to look like and that’s my good friend Trena. Me and Trena have been friends since we were little. Our dads are best friends and share a love of music; so of course it was only natural for me to always hang out with her and her two sisters. Trena made it to NYC before me. Her and her husband played a HUGE part in me getting to where I am today. They have two amazing kiddos of their own.Just like when we were kids… I’m ALWAYS at their house and Godmother to their youngest. It was so easy to say “You are Bella’s mommy!!!”

Stephanie UNDERSTOOD THE ASSIGNMENT!!!! YAAAAAAAAS!!! COME THROUGH HONEY!!!! Illustrations were completed and then it came time for formatting. First let me say that I had no clue what all I had signed up for. I am learning as I go. I had no idea I needed formatting. I just thought I got my illustrations and then that was it!!! NOOOOOPE!!! Someone was recommended but her time frame was much different than mine. So I went with a black owned company based out of Austin called 105 publishing. BOOOOOI let me tell y’all something. Catch all of this here Texas drawl…. YAAAAALLLLLLL!!! 105 came in CLUTCH!!!!! YAAAAAAS!!! I was so nervous and they WALKED.ME.THROUGH.EVERYTHING!!!!! They even took me through steps that I didn’t even know that were needed!!! The end product was this right here

I was a nervous wreck!!!! I had seen everything on a screen but not actually held it in my hands because WORK TRAVEL!!! I was nervous to release it to the masses without actually seeing it in my own hands, but took that big scary ass leap of faith and hit “PUBLISH” What was supposed to take a few days took exactly 1 day and a few hours!!! YAAAAALLLLLL I DID IT!!!! INSANE!!! This is a HUGE dream for me and I finally did it. Am I finished?? HELL NO!!!! Nowhere near finished.

I am on a little bit of a pause though. Why?? Because work has brought me back to Paris. Not Paris Texas but Paris France. I’ll be here for a week and then we are off to the mountains somewhere. It was like a 6 hour flight that felt like LIGHT YEARS!!! We left at 1030ish in the morning and didn’t land until 11ish at night. Time difference doesn’t normally mess with me when traveling here but this time… It’s kicked my ass all over the place. I got to my hotel room around midnight-ish. I called my boyfriend and my mom and then immediately popped Benadryl to go to sleep. Y’all. I didn’t go to sleep till 330ish in the morning. Woke around 11ish but didn’t leave my room till around 130-2p in the afternoon. This new covid variant is out kicking ass and taking names so I knew I wasn’t going to be outside doing a bunch of stuff. I went for a walk, took a few pictures, went to the grocery store and then came back to my room to order uber eats. I watched Netflix and worked on crocheting a scarf. I brought snacks and wine from the store.

Wine is very important on your off days. Its so important that when you can’t find a glass that you just plug in a straw and GO TO WORK!!!

Sippy sip sip

I have a late start today but I am pretty sure that I am not doing anything special tonight. It is going to be a day of work… and then sleep. What are y’all getting into??

OAN: BUY MY BOOK!!!! ITS AVAILABLE ON AMAZON!!!! www.amazon.com/dp/B09NNH7NF6/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_QYB9XPBGG65

Treat Cho Self

What It do good people of the blogging world?!?!?!?! I had the most epic weekend!!! Wanna know what I did?? I SPOILED MYSELF!!! This was supposed to be a weekend of pampering and all of the fun and it DID NOT disappoint.

I started off my weekend by first being off from work. I love my job but being able to sleep in on Saturday mornings is FREAKING AMAZING!!! I slept until 7ish(That’s sleeping in for me) and then proceeded to tackle the death mountain of laundry that has been chillin in the laundry basket forever. That doesn’t mean things were put away. It just means that things were folded… and then placed on my bed. HA!!! Laundry was not the plan for my new found weekend freedom. Oh Noooooooo nooooo nooooooooo. My plan was to get my hair done, and then go have girl time with some kick ass members from my running group. YAAAAAAAAAS!!!! Ya girl has BEEN READY FOR THIS!!!! BEEN READY!!!!

First exciting part of my day was getting this here hair DONE!!! Y’all my hair hasn’t seen a salon or anyone else’s hands for like 4 years. And the last time I went to the salon I got a BOMB ASS short cut. I have this thing were I follow stylist on instagram. I have been following this stylist named Julie for like 3 years. I started following her because her fro was the most BOMBTASTIC ASS FRO I had ever seen. Her hair was full with a SICK amount of body and all of her clients had the same BOMB ASS HAIR!!! I was like “I need to get TO HER!!! She has to do my hair!!!!” I was on her site every week trying to get an appointment and FINALLY one opened up and I SNATCHED IT with a quickness. I tootsie Rolled, cabbage patched and moonwalked for two weeks because I was just THAT DAMN EXCITED!!!I was trapped in funky ass Palm Beach so knowing that I was going to get to go home to have this hair genie do my hair was my saving grace. AND THEN…. Covid’s funky ass sat down and shut the whole gosh damn world down. Which means… My hair was not getting done. I still followed her on instagram though. Julie went through her highs and lows and wasn’t ashamed to talk about it which made me even more of a fan. 2 years later homegirl stepped back on the scene with a new attitude, new look, new energy, and A NEW SALON!!! I finally hit a patch where I had money and time TOGETHER and I made an appointment!!! I GOT AN APPOINTMENT YALL!!! ** insert tootsie roll, cabbage patch and moonwalk here** I didn’t get an appointment with Julie but with one of her other wizard stylist. I knew if they were on her team then they were FIYA because she does not do anything half way. My appointment was with Sade.

Let me show you my before pic really quick so you can see the foolery that this woman had to deal with.

My hair is next level FOOLERY!!!!!

Y’all see this?!?!?!?!?! 4 years I’ve been me battling it out with my hair and that was all about to change!!! I.COULD.NOT.WAIT!!!! I left home early so I could make it on time . I took the elevator up to the salon and was greeted with a wide open door and R&B music!!! Julie looked up from what she was doing and said “Come on in. Why everyone peek around the corner all scared like??” LOL!!! Its not a big salon but that did not take away from the vibe AT ALL!!! It was nothing but good energy that flowed in and out of that place. Everyone was in a seat and every stylist was handling business. I am an observer,So I loved that I was able to sit comfortably in the gold velvet club chair and watch these three amazing black women work magic on every head that they touched. There were twist outs, coils, glosses, silk presses and more. Their hands never stopped moving!!!

Ignore my backpack chillin by the chair. I need these chairs in my home!!! So amazing!!!

A few minutes after arriving, I was draped in the salons signature robe cover up and she took me to one of the two sinks to tackle the beast of hair. Y’all SOMEONE BESIDES ME WASHED MY HAIR!!!! Do you know how awesome it was to have someone else do that job?!?!?! FOR once it wasn’t my fingers to cramp up!!! She used some kind of peppermint shampoo and I could have cried real tears of joy… but I held it together. I don’t know what kind of conditioner she used… but the brush glided through my wet mass of hair with ease. Not one pull, snap, comb break…. NONE OF THAT!!!! It was like gosh damn butta!!!! Sade… AAAYE… how you do that?!?!?!?! There was like no hair struggle!!!NONE!!! She twisted my hair up and sat me under a dryer for a little bit and again I was able to watch all of these women do what they loved. Everyone in there was GORGEOUS but every woman that left those chairs left with a certain swagger that COULD NOT be matched!!! Wait wait wait let me back up a second. I GOT TO MEET JULIE!!!! She’s kind of a big deal and I completely fan girled out in my head but I held it together on the outside… Or at least I think I did. I was in the presence of the freaking HAIR QUEEN!!!!! I had so many questions and was DYING to ask her everything but homegirl was working magic on another woman’s hair . Music continued to pump through those speakers and Sade continued to work her awesome magic on my hair. She was so amazing and nice and more than happy to let me in on the know about my hair and what it needed. She was easy to talk to, super nice and funny. She took that towel off my head and I was like “Ok here we go. Nows the real test.” Y’all… YAAAAALLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!

I was trying to figure out “How are your hands not tired yet?? Not one cramp?? None?!?!?!?!” She wrangled the beast like it was nothing. I have a lot of hair and its THICK, IGNANT… Yes I said IGNANT and it fights back. She handled it LIKE THE BOSS SHE IS!!!! She took her time and went through piece by piece and had me walking out of there feeling like gosh damn Beyonce!!!!

Do you see this?!?!?! Do you see this??!?!?!?!?! I can feel my scalp!!! Look!!!! LOOOOOOOOOOOK!!! I walked out of there feeling like a MF black goddess rockstar!!! ** swings hair left and right** THANK YOU CITRYNE ROSE for opening your doors. Thank you Julie because your vision was manifested and AMAZING!!! Thank you Sade for taking such amazing care of me and my hair.

Alright So I left the magical salon and RUSHED to go pick up my girl Crystal because we had a birthday bash to get to in Delaware. We were so late. Like beyond regular black people late. Completely missed the sexy dance class… Like all of it. So we did the next best thing. We stopped at a gas station, changed to our dinner dresses, retouched the makeup and met up with everyone for the dinner celebration. We were late to that too BUT we made it and had the most amazing time celebrating our friend Cardi. Cardi is the most amazing soul on this planet. She’s a wonderful woman, teacher, mother, athlete, friend… she’s a FUCKING ROCKSTAR!!! She is the giant personality in a TINY body. Dont let that “tiny” Fool you though. She can JACK YOU UP without blinking and keep it moving. It was so awesome to celebrate her and laugh and just let loose with our running sistas!!! Cardi was amazing and let me and Crystal crash at her place so we wouldn’t have to drive back to Jersey so late. Cardi was like “I have a dog you guys but he loves humans” I was like “I ALREADY LOVE HIM!!!!!” YAAAAAAAAALLLLLLL his name is Junior and he’s this beautiful giant brown and white pitty!!!!! I loved all on that dog. He got all of my belly rubs and hugs and kisses. He even slept outside of the room. If he heard me or Crystal move, he would walk in to check on us and then go lay back down to sleep.

Me and Crystal were up early so we wouldn’t take up too much of Cardi’s time. This was her day to CHILL OUT and we wanted her to have ALL OF HER TIME!!! After we said our goodbyes and gave hugs we looked at each other and said “BREAKFAST!!!!!!!” We filled the car up with gas and hit the road to Bob Evans.

We ordered some of everything. There was NO ROOM on our table!!! We ate everything that was in front of us and then had stuff to bring home!!! I couldn’t have asked for a better weekend. Crystal is the most wondermous hilarious soul!!! She has amazing taste in music, is just as goofy as I am, we both turn into two random old ladies at the simplest things and SHES THE MOST AMAZING SPIRIT!!!! Yeh we have more road trips coming up. I was able to let loose and unwind this weekend and it has been a really long time since I have done that. I was able to TREAT MYSELF to black girl joy and share in others black girl joy and there is NOTHING… NOTHING more amazing that that.

DUMP DUMP and More DUMP

I started writing this blog like a week ago and then stopped because I just didn’t feel like writing. I started again the other day on the airplane but then decided that sleep was more important. I am now determined to finish what I started. This is about to be a complete DUMP of words and photos. It has been an absolutely insane 2 months. It hasn’t been bad… Just long. The last 1/2 of travel was the hardest because even though I had time off to “Chill” I couldn’t. Why? Because I didn’t have my own personal space to turn off. I was off but still surrounded by everything that wasn’t me. Oh well, thats just part of the job **shrugs** I got to see some really cool shit though. I can say that I really enjoyed this work trip.

Exhibits 1-5

Alright so I already wrote about Paris and the Antibes. We then drove like 6 hours from Antibes to some little magical beach town that was on the South West side of France and apparently it was like a hop skip and a jump from Spain. Don’t ask me where we were because I honestly have no idea. I know we were a stones throw from the water and a skip away from the largest sand dune in Europe. YAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLL.** catch every bit of this here Texas Drawl** That damn sand dune was an adventure in itself. OH MAH GAH!!!! It was the coolest thing EVER and something that I can knock off the ole bucket list even though it wasn’t even on the list. You could use the stairs to go to the top or just walk the actual dune. We were towing a kid with us so we took the stairs. Can we say killer Cardio??? Then you made it to the top and at the very bottom was a beach. It was also 3000000 million degrees outside so my black ass was COOKING FOR REAL!!!

So we made it to the top and took a few pics as you can see above and then it was time to walk back down. Now I am not a person who is scared of heights but as I started walking down I looked out and was like… WHERE THE FUCK is the bottom???!??!?!?! All I saw was edge and NOTHING ELSE!!! Look y’all… My little chocolate life flashed before my eyes and I was NOT about to go out like that. I walked right back up to where I started and found the stairs to make my way down. Walking back up that sand dune( THE SAND… not the stairs) took EVERYTHING I had because I felt like I was traveling but not moving. I knew I was walking but it just felt like I was staying in one spot because the sand was sucking all of my steps. One of the hardest walks Ive done. GEEEEEZZZZZ! Would I do it again. ABSO-FREAKIN-LUTELY!!!!!

This magical city that the dune was located in was also the place where I took the huge step of going full speed ahead with my children’s book series. I found an illustrator and was able to map everything out with her and it as so amazing sharing energy with her. It was nice to brainstorm with someone who totally understood what I was saying and knew how important it was for me to have a black woman create with me. Representaion matters to me and I want every little black girl out there to feel represented in the books that I create. I never want them to feel like they are just a supporting cast or not good enough. My illustrator was ablate capture everything that I was describing from skin tone, to hair texture and color, to different styles … EVERYTHING. I can not tell you how exciting that was. I am still excited!! I will be able to share more about the process as it begins to unfold a bit more. Right now everything is still rough.

Alright so we left the unknown city and drove another two hours to a place called Biarritz. Yooooooo… It was like Paris was picked up and dropped on a beach with a sprinkle of Cali vibe. It was super chill there. Farmers market every day. Fruit was amazing… even the ole grocery store fruit was out of this world. It was such a freaking walkable place. Speaking of walking let me just slip in here that every freakin day I cleared over 8 miles… A DAY!!!! Ya girl was GETTIN IT IN!!!!!! My legs and waist line are headed in the right direction. Ok back to regular programming. This place was GORGEOUS!!!! the massive rock formations in the water. HELL THE WATER itself was magical!!! The water was so freaking blue and the waves were MASSIVE!!! There was this weird level of peace and chaos all at the same time.

While there, my boss was like “There is cool bridge that goes over the water. It’s kind of scary but you should check it out.” Ok telling me that it’s “kind of scary” translate to “I DARE YOU… I DOUBLE DOG DARE YOU” and whoooooo am I to turn down a dare??? I’ve done some stupid shit in my life; so walking over a big ass bridge seemed like NOTHING!! Not only did I walk the bridge but I climbed the rocks to sit on the very tippy top of the formation. I don’t think we were supposed to climb it but sometimes I like to test my boundaries.

Y’all I was gone for 2 months!!!! I had two months of work in another country where I was able to explore the people and places that surrounded me. I also enjoyed just spending time by myself sitting in my room or just finding a random place to be just a little bit weird. Exbits 1,2,3,4 and 5

It is ok to be outside of your zone. Sometimes you tend to learn a little bit more about yourself. I like stepping outside of my zone but not for too long. I like to refer to myself as an adventure homebody. I like to go out and try crazy stuff or run crazy races, or go on hike in the middle of nowhere. It’s just that at the end of it all I need to be able to go back home so I can chill and recharge. After a good recharge, I can go back out and find another adventure. Covid is recking havoc on my adventure side. I’m learning to find different ways to have adventures. That can mean learning a new skill, a new stitch for crocheting or new meditation. I have two adventure goals for 40. I want to learn how to skateboard and I want to learn how to drive stick shift. I’ve been researching different skateboards for beginners and I think I am going to get a long board. I will keep you posted on how all of this plays out.

OK DUMP TIME IS OVER AND I NEED A NAP because my body is still on France Beach Time.